To read what really happened, read Exodus.
Moses stands on the top of the mountain while God writes on the tablets. He feels restless and slips his hand into his pocket. He pulls out his new Android.
“Aaron, whatcha doin’?” He text his brother.
His brother doesn’t answer. Moses goes to his Facebook App and checks Aaron’s news feed:
“Everyone is collecting all of their gold.” Aaron had updated his status two minutes ago.
Two minutes? Moses frowned. Why didn’t he answer his text?
“Aaron, why are you collecting gold?”
“Moses, did you understand everything I had put down.” God spoke suddenly.
Moses sighed. “Yes, Lord.” He fidgeted some more, counting the stars and wondering what God named all those stars. His Android beeped.
Aaron updated his status again. “We’re melting all the gold now. It’s so exciting.”
Moses sent another text: “Aaron, what are you making?”
Aaron didn’t answer.
God handed him the tablets. What was he saying again? Moses missed the whole conversation. He carried the tablets down, beaming with joy that he spent so much time with God. His Android beeped and he stopped halfway down the mountain.
Aaron’s status read: “Just built a golden calf. Finally, something to worship that we can see and that’s here right now.”
Moses ran down the mountain and when he saw the golden calf, he threw the stones down. Then, he text God.
God didn’t answer.
“God, are you there?” Moses tried again.
Moses’ Android beeped.
God had updated his Facebook status: “Israel just built a golden calf to worship. I think they need to learn how to wait.”
Moses text God: “Lord, please forgive us.”
God text back. “I’m sorry, I was busy texting. I missed your message. What did you say?”
Israel spent the next several years waiting for the Promised Land. God suspended Aaron and Moses from their Facebook accounts and took away their Androids. They needed to learn to listen.
What are you feeding your soul? Are you paying attention?