Once in a while all the blogs on my reader will talk about the same subject. It seems we PMS at the same time sending our loneliness, our pain out into the black space. We’re trying to connect with each other, share our pain, and maybe dispel it, spreading it out like too much paint poured out onto white paper. Maybe if we spread it out thin enough we can see through the paint to the white paper beneath it. Or maybe it’s just paint we move around with our fingers, creating a more complicated situation because we fail to move out of God’s way. We fail to trust Him to clean up the paint.
Oh, what a mess we create when we attempt to fix it ourselves!
I logged out of my reader. My own pain made reading others’ pain almost unbearable. I forgot the joy as I sat there staring at my computer screen. I forgot that the burden isn’t mine to carry. I remember how many times I have tried to carry them, and I sigh. It’s time to push away from the computer and step out into the sunlight. It’s time to put away the paints and stop making messes. It’s time to live. It’s time to just breathe in the summer air and thank God for the blessings in my life instead of ruminating about the pain.
Don’t get me wrong.
I love reading your blogs. I love praying over your pain. My fingers dip into your paint and try to find your fingers to link together in joint prayer. But today I am unable to read your pain. My own dark mood grows darker and I must search out the joy again in other activities, in the people in my life, and in the blessings I ignore because my pain hides them. But I will return tomorrow to read about your pain and to pray over you.
Today is a day to be thankful that life is good; people love me; I am the daughter of a King; and of how much I’ve grown in Christ.
Describe something that makes you grateful.